Friday afternoon in Beverly Hills

So we've been here in So Cal as a married couple since 2003 (I lived here before but didn't ever do anything interesting so my tourist-y life starts with Dennis). And it took us that long to go to Beverly Hills. I think we wouldn't have even gone but Dennis has a friend from the bank who wanted to do our hair and it was something we couldn't pass up.

We felt like huge tourists. And I felt like I was in the movie "Pretty Woman" (as an extra...)



Here is a red-carpet event with photogs and security... For what looked like Hennessy. The alcohol.




















At Tiffany's (well at the doorway...)


As close as I'll ever get...



On Beverly Drive, right before we went to the Gap (which I know we could have found anywhere but they were having a good sale on jeans...)


Dennis on the corner of Wilshire and Rodeo :)
































Dennis in front of this mega- Rodeo Sign that I kept zooming in on...






Zooom











Zoom back out...




















Wait- What in the world is the woman behind me doing? Is she a mime?


Dennis wanted to have a photo here too...


Hahahahaa! I was sucking my tummy in super hard for this shot and Dennis didn't even get my whole body!!




And we ended up missing the evening traffic on the 405 so it was a nice evening! (I can't say we had anything glamorous for dinner- we had McDonald's, which ended up upsetting both of our tummies).

neither have talent.

okay. sometimes what kara said was helpful during the season. but srsly, the show didn't need her.

second best site of the week. ever.

Blingee aka "Seizure-inducing site of the week"

I decided to bling out my Kindergarten picture. Because my 7 year old face needed some glitter and some Kanye West glasses.



And then I thought "what else can I bling?"




Tom Cruise!
(Note: The creator (me) does not want to imagine a world where dancing snoops rejoice as a gun shoots in the general direction of a bunny rabbit wishing the world lots of love.)

Boobtarded...

there are a bazillion jokes and puns for this. Am I the only one who heard her say "ow!" a few times??

Question: Is it really sexy to be with a woman whose breasts are so synthetically enhanced that she can use them to crush watermelons?

In response to Angelina hate...

Touche.

Thanks to Gallery of the Absurd and my dear friend Sarah

Oh Madonna, no.

Dear Madonna:
Please go away. Just go away and retire and stop showing up in public with Justin Timberlake. These shoes are ridiculous, you will only wear them once, and they probably cost as much a month of rent in Los Angeles. Just stop. Guns? Really?

Thanks,
Erin

Everyone town has them.

Every town/city/hamlet must have their own idiot drivers who are especially annoying at grocery store parking lots.




Malibu collects idiot drivers who are really idiot people who hire limos to go to the grocery store to buy things like ICE. They are annoying especially because:
a)They block the entire lane with their limo and then motion for you to move around.
b)They think they are more important as people than they really are.

These are the same people, mind you, who park their hummers in compact car parking spots so that you can't around them when you are pulling out of the parking lot or so that they end up double parked thus limiting where you can park.

Is this what I think it is?

Is this Saran Wrap? Or is it my computer screen and the bad lighting?

People's Court LOLZ

Because of our situations in life, Dennis and I have the unique time available to watch "The People's Court". It's kind of trash tv but not quite Jerry Springer... I think.

Point: Seriously, there are some stupid people. We are watching a case where this guy is suing because he bought a dog- he wanted the dog to be a boy and found out later that it was a girl. He wants to be compensated because he was given a girl dog. How do you buy a dog, keep a dog for long enough to name it and dress it in outfits, and not realize it is not a boy?? Seriously. There are some really obvious things that you as a man yourself should obviously notice as missing. He is claiming this was fraud. Seriously.

This is the poor dog who is too embarrassed to look at the TV because her owner is retarded and gave her a gender-identity crisis.


And this is the retarded owner, who also wants compensation for boy dog clothes that he obviously cannot use on a girl dog. (OMG. Seriously.)
The case before: I can't even recall the actual point of the case. This guy was suing this woman because he put new windows in her apartment and paid for it all and she didn't pay him back. Her defense was that it was a gift or something and that he was trying to get romantic with her. He said that this wasn't true because "look at her" (i.e. "she's ugly, judge"). I would not say she is ugly. But I will say that the reason I can't tell you the main part of the case is because I was transfixed with this woman's hair. A Sculpted hot mess that I'm sure someone spent a lot of time on. It's talented and bizarre at the same time.


This is a blackberry pearl camera phone- I'm not sophisticated clearly. But you can see kind of what I see (plus the look on her face because she lost because she basically has to pay for what she thought was free windows from a guy who just called her ugly on national tv).

ridiculous before the weekend.

I've been meaning to post this kind of thing for YEARS.

It's a pro and a con to living in Malibu. The pro is that people are really generally honest here. You can forget to lock your car and be pretty confident that nothing will happen. I'm guilty of leaving my phone or my backpack in plain sight and I realize that I have this security only in Malibu. But it is really ridiculous. I remember when I moved here from the Valley, which is only about 30 miles away and yet so different, that I was really shocked- people who own convertibles leave their tops down all the time, when they are parked outside everyday places like the grocery store/movie theater/drug store/Starbucks. I still, after 7 years of living here, think "But aren't they afraid someone is going to steal something?" People don't just leave the top down (which invites theft of the entire car, right?) but they leave things inside. It just boggles my mind. Who leaves their car so vulnerable? Outside of Malibu, is that normal??