geocities closing? WTH?

I dont even know why I'm randomly clicking on my geocities sites but I'm kind of thankful I did. Apparently geocities is closing. Which is fine, except that I'm in Japan right now and kind of can't transfer all of my files. Which I really want to do because I put a lot of work into that, especially the pages for our immigration story and such.

And this means that the website I created for my sister is forever closed and missing. I tried logging in but yahoo can't find my username. Which makes me really sad. I put a lot of effort into that, especially writing out my thoughts after she died. So I'm really bothered. There's nothing I can do about it, and I'm really surprised that yahoo didn't send out emails. I think this makes me want to print out, at the very least, all that I made about Dennis and I, because I had some really special stuff there.

I hope I can get this fixed.

updates!

I had a good birthday. I turned 27 on Wednesday. It wasn't as traumatic as my 26th birthday- I got a lot of love this year in the form of cards and online greetings and Dennis took me to a really really nice restaurant (Hawaiian fusion!). My Dad actually sent me flowers. They are gorgeous and moved me, considering the fact that Dad rarely even sends me a birthday card (he has a new girlfriend and I surmise that she is pretty awesome). Unfortunately said flowers have given me serious hayfever and allergic reactions. But I love and cherish them and am really really sad that they can't stay in our living room. (They are hiding in our guest room/office right now because I can't throw them away! My Dad bought me flowers!!)

I did break lent for my birthday but I had already decided that you can't blow candles out of an apple. You can't tell from this photo, but it's a chocolate souffle with a candle. And bananas foster on the side. (I can't even just have a little sugar on my birthday.)

On an unrelated note, we are still seriously talking about moving to Monterrey, Mexico. Don't anyone freak out because it highly depends on Dennis getting accepted to the PhD. program that he is applying for. I think he has good chances. Things like this have increased my stress level and I wonder if I might rename my blog to "ERIN FREAKS OUT ABOUT EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME-BLOG!"

So I'm trying to figure out how to get caught up and organized for life. Right now, school is a priority (one reason my blogs are few and far between and always end up like updates!) I need to make a resume. I registered the other day for my last classes in this degree that has taken FOR-EVER to finish and that was kind of a strange feeling. I imagine that I am not done with school yet, as I have started thinking about getting another degree (in what? not sure!).




Can I put LOL-speak on my resume?

Milestones...

I belong to a forum for diabetics who are women and who are mothers or who want to be mothers. I'm not planning anything right now but it has been motivational for getting my health under control. Anyway, when your diabetes is under control, you tell everyone in the forum and they give you a dancing frog (so under 7.0 A1C). My A1C two weeks ago was a 7.8, which is the best I've ever had. It's a milestone and the forum members awarded me with a tadpole. I've been keeping it on my computer harddrive but I haven't been really keeping up with trying to do better. But posting it here might help me to stay focused (I've caved twice in the past week and had some french fries and I've decided to give up candy and cake, except for Mar.11 bday cake, for lent). I just feel like I have so many goals and things I have to do this year, and I think I've been putting the goal of being healthy on the backburner.

I got this email when I was wasting time on facebook (which very well might steal my soul). I'm going back to Japan so I've been raising money. I've reached my half way point, but I don't know how because I can think of 10 people that I know I need to talk to but that I have put off writing letters too. It's another goal.

I'm also taking Japanese, kind of. I'm sitting in on a class but I'm not really auditing it because I'm not paying for it, because the professor and his department have been really ridiculously graceful and generous. But tomorrow morning, there is an exam. I haven't studied and now I feel like I should talk to the professor and just ask him if I can not worry about this exam? I feel really bad, like I'm already wasting his time and like him grading my exam would be just worse. I feel like a flake.

Which brings me to my 10am midterm tomorrow morning. It's something else I haven't satisfactorily studied for. But I'm paying for this class, and I think I might be smarter if I studied and did well for it. But this is like the story of who I am as a student right now- I'm flaking on my studies and putting things off and hoping that I can just get by. It's not how I want to do things, and I'm probably being too hard on myself. I'm just really tired and stressed out.

Which brings me to my whole life right now. I finish school finally in December. My husband doesn't have a job and the US economy is not providing him with anything. We are talking about moving back to Chile or to another country, in general. Which freaks me out. The thought of moving to another country and changing my life so dramatically all by myself (with Dennis), so freaks me out that I feel like I'm almost paralyzed. It's like I'm sabotaging myself physically, spiritually, and scholastically because I'm terrified of the real world, of moving away, of the very very unknown. It's not that I don't have faith in God or in Dennis or in myself. It's that I'm just so anxious about this that I can't even concentrate properly. Me, who has to two hours early for a flight when they say be one hour early. Me, who has to show up 15-30min. early for a movie just because I want to pick the best seats possible. I turn into Godzilla if we miss one preview. Not knowing, not having a clue, not having any control.

I realize, as I type this, that this is what I'm doing. I'm so freaking out that I'm sabotaging myself. Which is absurd because I, of all people, know how amazing God is and how much things can change in one year. In less!

I am a banana in pajamas.

Let me rejoice in this glorious time, when I can be in pajamas for most of the week and blame it on my status as a graduate student. I had a big retreat on Friday and Saturday for Japan and now I have nothing until Thursday morning. Which means I celebrated Martin Luther King in my pajamas perusing facebook. And while I did indeed watch the presidential ceremonies today and I did tear up and fall in love with the Obama daughters, etc., I did also return to bed after I saw George W. board the helicopter.

I do have more important things to do. I can get dressed, go for a walk, do the dishes, clean our apartment or do the laundry, or take out the trash... Or really more importantly, I could do my homework. I have some reading to do, especially for all of the many book reviews that are due at the end of the semester AKA in two months. And if I did do my homework, it would certainly lend credence to any of my arguments when they do happen, with Dennis about just how busy I am as a graduate student. (As in "hey, I work really hard! I'm a full-time graduate student!")

I think that this is my last year to use this excuse. I am finishing classes in December and while I expect for the comprehensive exams to be really tough (the ones I must pass in order to get my degree in April of 2010...), I know that a year from now I am going to be worrying more about my resume (which I still need to write...) and all of the real grown up stuff that comes along with GROWING UP.

I'm rejoicing. And freaking out.

With one minute to spare...

On an unrelated note, I have discovered that there is a problem with my body clock. One week ago, I was able to without a clock, wake up at 6 or 7am. Now, because I have to be in class at 8am, I am automatically exhausted and cannot wake up on time. I woke up at 7:59 for my 8am class today. I did not wear my pajamas. Exactly. (I wore jeans and a sweater).


And here is a blog post you should read as it had me thinking about our daughters (our collectively as a people, but also Dennis's daughters and the girls that I teach in Sunday school and see around at church): Real Girls, Real Pressure. Let's not reinforce old and bad habits, mmkay?

mental housekeeping...

there are some things I need to get down in words.

First, the facebook photo situation has been resolved: My nephew complained that he hates this photo. I can relate. People have photos of me tagged where I look like a fat cow. But maybe I was looking at this from the most selfish of all angles. My nephew is a young college kid who needs as many facebook photos of himself where he looks cool as he can get, because he is a young kid in college. It all makes perfect sense. So, I have conceded. I removed his name from the photo and he is no longer tagged. But I keep my photo online. Those are my terms and we are no longer in negotiations. (At least, I'm no longer negotiating).

Second, my brain is mush. I have finals this upcoming week and while these are mainly papers, this is where my focus of attention is resting. I need this week, at least until after Tuesday at midnight, to focus on school. Hence, the following open letter is necessary:
Dear husband,
Apologies, because I cannot be bothered until I finish my assignments. I have, literally five brain cells and they are all on school. So this means I am not going to have time to clean out the spare bedroom so my brother is at home when he visits on Friday. It will get done but maybe not to your satisfaction. Oh well. My brother is quite possibly the messiest bachelor ever so I'm sure he will not mind.

I'm also not in a position to care about cooking. I'm eating a salad and that alone deserves applause. Do NOT give me "that" look when I eat a few oreos. I'm stressing out majorly and a few oreos are not going to kill me. Yes, I know I had a panic attack last week about how I was feeling fat and I'm such an idiot for not caring better about what I eat. And I fully expect you to react as you did last week, by being supportive and helpful. Do not act like the food police when I decide to binge and have 3 oreo cookies as a reaction to my body's natural cortisol production as a response to stress.

Also, don't freak out because I am also coincidentally very absentminded right now. As I said, I have FIVE brain cells functioning right now. So if I mess up dates and times or forget words, lay off.

Finally, keep on with the supportive hugs and such. You are the best ever and the source of my sanity.

Much love,
your wife, who wishes she was really always right.

'Tis the Season...

'Tis the season for stressing out about papers. I have two papers that I have procrastinated on and one is due tomorrow evening. I have faith in myself, but I can't sleep because my papers are one thing that is going through my mind right now despite the sleep aids. This is what happened last night. I started freaking out about my term papers, especially the one due before Thanksgiving, and I spent the night working on it instead of sleeping.

Which has led me to believe and come to terms with the fact that I'm 26 and not 20 and that all-nighters are no longer feasible for me. I've also been thinking about how my undergraduate classmates stress so much about their grades. And I'm reminded that I really could care less about grades I received years ago so it doesn't really matter. The problem that I face is that in recognizing that my grades don't determine my self-worth, I find myself sometimes sliding into an apathetic and unmotivated academic attitude. If it doesn't really matter, why should I stress myself out. Unfortunately, stressing myself out at the last minute for things like papers is the key to my academic success. I always seem to triumph or at least slide by if I work up to the 11th hour.

My apathy towards school is really a symptom of a larger picture. Quite frankly, I have bigger issues in my life. Dennis isn't working, my hormones are freaking out, I'm worried about my dad, etc. And I am starting to think about life after school, where they really don't care what grade you got on a certain paper. I just don't want my apathy to turn into laziness and apathy in other aspects of my life.

So, I've been stressing myself out and thus I feel like garbage. Trying to pull an all-nighter didn't work and made me feel sick. So I was lying in bed listening to the rain outside, thinking instead about all the things that worry me. I'm worried about school. I'm worried about our future after I graduate. I'm worried about my diabetes. We want to have children, eventually, and I want to be healthy when we do that. In realizing that we will be moving a year from now, I am also realizing that "right around graduation" was when we keep telling people we will start trying to pop out kids. Which means I can no longer procrastinate and not take things like my blood sugars seriously. I have to care. So I find myself caring more about things like my diabetes than I do about my Old Testament Pentateuch class.

I can't sleep so much that I am actually trying to think of things to make for Thanksgiving. Typically, we get invited to a local family's house for the meal. Not family but church friends. This year we don't have invites and I'm actually a little relieved because in our early married years, we went to Denny's for Thanksgiving. A part of me (the part of me that is pushing towards being a real grown up), wants to make something on Thanksgiving. Not a turkey (we wouldn't eat it) but maybe some comfort foods (I'm thinking about deviled eggs, mashed potatoes, stuffing and a small small ham of sorts.) I'm debating on whether or not desert should be included as I am the only one who really eats sweets and Dennis isn't a big pumpkin fan. I'll figure it out but this is what is keeping me up at night.

Or my mind wanders to the stuff our church is doing for the poor people in the area and when they travel to Mexico. They have asked for blankets and I think I am going to give a bunch of blankets away. I came from a family that never ever through away blankets. I don't know why but blankets were just always valuable, even second-hand ugly and outdated ones. We have a few that we never use and don't need. I'm trying to downsize everything we own whenever I get the opportunity because as I've hinted earlier, we are probably moving.

According to Dennis, we will ideally stay in Southern California. It's the easiest way to move. He is looking at jobs in Florida and in Texas. If he cannot find any jobs, we are considering moving back to Chile. In Chile, Dennis can work as an online professor for a school in the states and get a job in Chile. Chile, as in every other place in the world, is economically freaking out. Someone needs to give my husband a job. We need health care and he needs to feel like he is providing again.

This list of things going on in my mind could go on forever. One of the things that I've been hearing again and again and trying to process is this idea of "God's timing". God waited until Sarah was 90 something before letting her have a baby. He waited YEARS before he got his people out of the desert to the actual Promised Land. And even after they arrived, they still had to fight for YEARS more to actually get the land. Things that happen in one or two verses in the Bible actually take a lot longer in real life. And so I'm told to be patient. God is all powerful and all knowing and has control and I just need to wait and have faith. It's just easier said than done. I can see, looking back on my life, times that I have felt God acting slowly and now those times seem to have gone by so fast. A week or even a year flies by and the person I was a year ago and the place we are in our life is just so different. But just every once in a while, it would be so nice to know for sure what is going to happen. More than what grades I'm going to get- where are we going to live? What will we be doing professionally? When will be start a family? I wish I could see God's plan instead of passively waiting on Him to act. It's frustrating and challenging and ever so easy to ask out loud "God, where are you? What are you doing? What is the point of this??"

Okay. I need to try to go back to sleep. I have to wake up early tomorrow to write this stupid paper.

Why Angelina Jolie hate?

So apparently, no one likes Angelina Jolie! I'm a little surprised! (A little.) I think that Brad is kind of annoying personally (actually he does a lot of good things). I just don't like him because to me, This is a massive cop-out. (Or a massive win for Brad, who has the cow and the milk for free).

Anyway, this is me today. I'm not sick just completely tired and unmotivated as far as school. It's just a lack of energy- I don't want to wake up for the 8am class I'm auditing and I don't want to read for my other classes. This will lead to panic in the coming weeks as two papers are due before thanksgiving which is approaching fast.


On a side note, Dennis and I are working with two other guys who may go with us to Japan next summer (fingers crossed that the timing works and we all have the ability to do what we are planning!) We made dinner and talked about it tonight with them and things look really good but I realized that once again I have a big mouth and I am very intrusive. God, I'm such a girl. I hope that we can work as a team without me interfering as an annoying female who wants to know marriage plans and medical histories. I know that Dennis, rightly so perhaps, says that I talk to much and I probably embarrass him. I've never met someone who is so closely the epitome of a meddling chatterbox, as I am myself.

*On another side note, this is like the 4th time this semester that Dennis and I have had a dinner for students/undergraduates. We are very old married couple mentorly aren't we. :) It's not heavy cooking- I made a frozen lasagna tonight.

Osmosis.

because I've been pretty exhausted for the past five days or so. not studying as much as I'd like....

(Seriously. I've noticed a new self-diagnosed ridiculous monthly body symtom. I'm comatose for 5-7 days. I have NO energy. I slept more than I was awake this weekend!)

my brain is fried.

As in "KFC sad bowl of chicken/mashed potatoes/mac 'n cheese/gravy" Fried.

I would like to not post something about tonight's political debate. It seems that there are loads of possible drinking games that one could create in this particular race. But I don't have any alcohol and I don't like getting drunk and sick. So instead, I offer this:


it's a bonus because this guy was referenced by my boss a few days ago and it made me think of authority figures who have talked to me with this exact voice (I'm thinking of someone in particular and this is that line, where you don't know how specific you can be because you know that your blog is public enough to hurt people's feelings. But there is a certain "authority figure" that definitely reminds me of this guy from "Office Space" that I deal with on a fairly regular basis... (Not you, Dave).

phone broken.

My beloved phone is broken and I will have to drive "out there" (through the canyon, outside of my bubble...) to go to a "special" AT&T store that deals with warranty issues like replacing the phone. Yesterday, we went because I've been getting SIM card (data card) errors. So they gave me a new SIM card. I'm convinced that the guy who handled my phone had sticky fingers or something because now (well, since last night), only half of my phone works. Not the important half. Basically, I can only make and get phone calls. And I can't end the call because the "end call" red button is one of the buttons not working.

I could go into details about why I'm annoyed with technology and AT&T etc. but I'm tired. So I will just say that hopefully today we can go out to fix my beloved phone. I didn't realize until I couldn't use it just how much I use and love this phone. I knew I loved it but really, I feel paralyzed.


also not working- the volume buttons and side button that turns camera on. WTF blackberry.

Quarter life crisis in the making.

I feel really old to be 26. It's not Dennis's fault or the fault of the fact that we live with people who are still barely legally able to drink.

It's been brewing in me for awhile but it came to a head tonight. I feel so old. I've been wearing black nail polish for about a month now. I think it's cute and it reminds me of the funner parts of high school. Dennis groaned. Apparently, black nail polish is not sexy. I counterattacked- not only are famous people who are my age and older wearing it, but it's actually being worn in fashion magazines. Chanel has a black polish. But the very thought of me wearing it makes me look juvenile.

This attack on my nails paralleled a similar discussion about having a glass of wine to relax. I reason this: I'm not drinking alone, I'm not binge drinking or drinking every day (or even every week!), I'm not a mother of anyone and really am not responsible for anyone except for myself, and I'm an adult. But apparently my urge to want to drink hints that I'm immature.

So what I see as me being a normal 26 year old is "immature". Maybe I am wrong. Maybe I should strive to be five years older than I am. Marriage, perhaps, means that you have to shrug off anything that makes you feel like an individual or young.

I'm kind of freaking out about this. If I'm "too old" for black nail polish or the thought of an occasional glass of alcohol, I'm definitely too old to do something really crazy like die my hair pink or get a nose ring.

Marriage and all of its' complications aside, I have one question:
a)Am I really too old to wear black nail polish. I know that I have 4 years on most of my classmates and that I can't wear the same fashions (leggings, painful boots, etc.) But can't I have the black nail polish?

update! update!

ugh. I know. I've been a lazy blogger. Not very good at posting anything. In a nutshell, I got distracted and then I got stressed and I've been very lazy.

I started school on Monday and I fear based on first impressions that this will be one of those semesters of Graduate work that I've got really paid for. Sometimes, because a lot of my classes are with undergrads, I feel like I can kind of skate through things. I'm pretty good at procrastinating and such and I've polished my skills at writing thing last minute or pretending I've read the text.

Also, when the Professor is asking you to read the first five chapters of the Gospel of John, and you've read those devotionally at random different times in different chunks and/or you've heard at least one sermon on them, you feel (or I feel, atleast) like I can just kind of figure out what I'm supposed to know.

This semester I'm taking a class on God and Providence and we are going to be reading ancient scholars and German scholars. It is a lot of words and I'm not really a reader and there are big theological words and concepts. It's an important class- the first of three that I need to take for my degree- and I am happy to know that I will be smarter for them. But these are daunting books and not only do I need to read them but I need to talk about them in class and write substantially on them.

I'm also taking a class on the first five books of the Bible, which shouldn't be as bad per se, but I do need to respond in writing to the required reading and there will be a paper and (ahem...)work.

What I am counting on, as fun, will be the Japanese class that I'm auditing. I'm enjoying it but I'm not paying for it, except in time and in the cost of the text books. I think it will be like yoga for my brain.

Dennis is teaching online for Kaiser College in Florida (I know not alot of this school so google it.) And he is looking for work, everywhere (like every place on earth that is hiring. But I refuse to move to Dubai, for example.)

So at the moment, I don't have an opinion on much outside of the little bubble of myself and Dennis and school. I don't even care about the whole president thing anymore.

The good and the bad news.

Of the day.
Well, of the hour.

I tried to pick up my bridesmaid dress today. It was too small. Not because I've gained weight- I've actually lost a jeans size (woo!). But rather because they miss-measured my boobs. I am actually a size up in the top, because I actually have a problem with having boobs that are too big. People pay money to have this problem.

I felt depressed the entire hour it took to drive home (there's only one David's Bridal in the area, and it's in the valley and takes forever to get there.)

But I've decided to cut myself some slack, as clearly these are not every day dresses. And people PAY to have this problem. Also, this store claims to sell designer looking gowns and they make a gigantic deal about how they tailor the dress to your exact measurements. And I conclude that this is a big fat lie. They actually have the dress in your size, but they have it at "the warehouse". They don't tailor it. If you don't count the expensive alterations, they just send your size. So it is as "tailored" as getting a spring dress at Old Navy or the Gap, but with rouching and satin.


I did find out that my cousin is having her wedding in the evening. So it is in the desert, but thank God it is as it starts to cool. Because this ball-gown dress was super heavy.

Also, a HUGE reason to be thankful:
My cousin is not making me wear anything in this material-


Jordin Sparks wore it last night on American Idol and now Cate Blanchett is wearing it. And it is horrible and not flattering. This material is ONLY for Mexican Wrestling Heros like Nacho Libre. NEVER for women.

I'm a bad Maid of Honor. Maybe.

I have been putting off the bridesmaid dress purchase for my favorite cousin (and my only girl cousin). It's $180 plus extra for a special sash and I hate bringing this up with Dennis, and I hate thinking about it, and I now really wish my cousin would have fallen in love with something a hundred bucks cheaper.

According to David's Bridal- I called two separate stores- if I order the dress this week, it will arrive the week before the wedding. Which is fine. Unless I need alterations. Which I wasn't planning on needing, and I don't know how big of a deal they are. One of my good friends who just had her own wedding and is a bridesmaid, and who is familiar with the store, said it takes less time than the store gives you.

So, it's just a pain. I have to go to the store to make sure that I fit- I've lost a little weight since I tried the dress on last. And the nearest store is like 45 minutes away.


I suppose all of this would be different if I felt a little more connected to what is going on with the bride. I am her maid of honor, and yet I have no idea what is going on in this wedding. I have no idea who the other bridesmaid is (there are only 2 of us). I don't know if she expects a bridal shower the day before the wedding (I will try to throw a bachelorette party...) And I have no clue what she wants, because she isn't registering. I don't know anything about the wedding, and I am just annoyed and frustrated. I can't make e-vites because most of her friends don't even have internet connection.

To all future brides:

Please communicate with your bridesmaids, especially if they are out-of-state. Please think of them when you are thinking of the dress. Think about the costs, think about the location- if you are having your wedding outside in a ghost town in New Mexico in the summer, pick a summery dress. Not a big-ass ballgown in black. (Actually, it was my suggestion to do black for myself as I am the Maid of Honor. But now that there are two of us, I suppose I could have stayed with red).
Just. Look, I know you are stressed out with life. Job, school, family. I get it. And I know that throwing a wedding isn't cheap. But if you don't communicate with your Maid of Honor, she might start to freak out.
Also, if you choose inexpensive options, you can do more. You probably will get better gifts too. I know you don't want to hear us say "I will look for the dress on EBay" (note: not what I have said or done) but you can't blame us after we fork over money for everything else.

Also, seriously, after all of this, you better not get divorced. And if you get remarried, do it in Vegas.

Thanks,
Erin

I am Beautiful. So stop nagging me.

I have spent the entire day in email-battle with my grandfather, who has made me very aware every time we are together in person, that I need to watch what I eat and lay off the sweets. He emailed me to say "happy birthday" and to simultaneously tell me about lap-band surgery and the fact that this can be a cure for diabetics.

I sighed at the email. Can my grandpa send me even a happy birthday without hinting that I'm overweight? So, I email him back. I decide that it is time that I say out loud/ write in email to my old grandpa, that he needs to stop reminding me of my weight. I say:

I think that the lap-band surgery works mainly for type 2 diabetics, who have diabetes that can be cured. There are advances on type 1 diabetes too, but surgery wouldn't cure me. Also, it could be dangerous because of my diabetes, which affects my ability to heal and my immune system. At any rate, lap-band surgery is also for people who are severely obese. I know I'm not as thin as I was in high-school, but I also don't think that I am severely obese. I see an endocrinologist and a diabetes educator/nutritionist once a month and they have never suggested that I was dangerously overweight. Thank you for thinking of me but I would appreciate an email exchange that doesn't include discussion of my weight- I know that you are worried about me and only tell me because you love me, but it hurts my feelings. I think I'm beautiful and I would think that you would see that to.

He emails me back:

Erin, you need to lighten up about your weight. There was no intent to criticize your weight, the information was taken from an article in the paper here in Dallas. Morbidly obese is defined as a person that is at least 100 pounds over there ideal weight. I don't think you classify in that case. Yes, I do care greatly about your health because I don't want to lose anymore family members and love you very much. I am also proud of your accomplishments and would like to see you both reach your goal of becoming professors. If you do not reach that goal it is not the end of the world and I am sure you will succeed in whatever that will be.

Your aunt Nancy was the one that told me when I inquired about you that she called you the morning after your birthday and you were eating cake for breakfast.

So, touche. Maybe. I mean, maybe I did react a little sensitively. But on the other hand, it is a consistent mention in our relationship and it hurts my feelings. So I kind of don't regret it. I really needed him to hear that I think that I am a beautiful and curvy girl who does not need to think about lap-band surgery. I do (hopefully doing some damage control) write back:

I'm sorry that I am sensitive about my weight. It's just something that I worry a lot about-it's probably the nature of the beast with grandaughters. We worry about our appearance and our weight a lot. It means a lot to me that you care and worry for me- I know you aren't against me and that you aren't attacking me intentionally. I love you too, and I hope that we are okay. I just needed to tell you that.


Can I get some validation? Am I the only one who understands how annoying it is to explain why I've gained some pounds since high school??? Was I too hard on him?

All of this makes me wish I had money for retail therapy. I so want this Holy Water bottle.

Here's a good one...

Things I'm going to have to start doing to pinch pennies:
1. Wash out plastic baggies and re use them
2. Wash tin foil.
3. Use the coffee filter for at least five times.
4. Mix water and milk to stretch out milk.
5. Put cow manure in my gas tank. Wait. We don't have cows...
6. Clip coupons.
7. Use real towels instead of paper towels.
8. Re use napkins and paper towels. (My grandma so totally does this.)
9. Use plastic containers that used to be for butter as tupper ware.
10. By GENERIC coffee.
11. Drink tap water.
12. Re-use envelopes.
13. Make bath-tub gin.
14. Make my own clothes. Which means learning to sew and collecting potato sacks.
15. Start charging Dennis for house cleaning and other favors. (e.g. Me washing HIS SOCKS= $1.00 per pair of socks.)

Anything I'm forgetting?


(PS: Dennis is such an old man. He just said "I've been saying that for like two years!" Really, he has.)

I hate Power Points

If you learn power point, you can get a decent grade in most college classes. I hate power point. I hate being creative and I hate it when I "do the basics" (as the cartoon says...) and then the person after me does something amazing like adding music or an mpeg file. I only know basic power point. So when a prof says "you probably should bring in a power point" I slap my head and say "doh!"

It is ironic. I love talking and I cannot keep my mouth shut when it comes to rumors. But I hate public presentations and the pressure to have a dazzling power point. My slide shows are usually short and blue with a white font. And usually, I stutter and have that nervous tone in my voice. The voice gets worse when I start thinking that the audience is bored. My slide show is boring. The teacher is bored. Two guys are in the back laughing, either at me or at something on a laptop....


Dennis, on the other hand, excels at power points and presentations. He has an accent but he also has confidence. And he is an over achiever. So he is "THAT GUY" that follows my presentation with a fantastic brilliant show that includes a moving acoustic version of "One" by Bono as his slide show comes to a close. He is the guy that makes power point presentations so good that the prof sheds a tear.

Today's Post is Sponsored by....

B-Relaxed Vitamin Water. Which should relax me while simultaneously reminding me that I should go do some sit-ups.

St. Patrick's Day. Isn't that supposed to be a holy day? Like a graceful day?

Tell that to whoever decided to give me a $40 parking ticket, giving my husband a subsequent heart attack. I'm this close to donating buckets of blood for money.

I'm part native american.

I'm part apache, per my great grandmother on my mom's side. She was an apache who grew up in a dirt-floor shack. And then she married an Irish miner named Henry O'Gilligan. They had four kids, and continued to live in poverty in New Mexico. Every once in a while, when those Indian Casino commercials come on, Dennis says "Hey you probably have rights to be part of one of these tribes."

In other news, I am going to celebrate the first day after my birthday by cleaning my apartment and studying Hebrew, and feeling kind of sorry for myself.